Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Our Twin Story

It probably wouldn't be a bad idea for me to write this down, before I forget everything... but please, don't think you have to read it all. It's just someone else's boring pregnancy and birth story.

Brief recap - We married in early July 1990, and by mid-July we were expecting our first child. Heck, we were just kids ourselves (fresh out of college, only 22!) and we were over the moon with excitement. We knew we wanted a large family, but the family joke is that we never exactly pinned down what "large" meant!

Our first four were born in 1991, 1993, 1996 and 1998. They weren't exactly "planned," but they were definitely welcome. We were just going with the flow. After Mister Four, I thought I'd had enough (no sniggering, please) and wanted to consider a tubal ligation. My husband asked if I'd consider Natural Family Planning instead, since sterilization and contraception are contrary to our faith. We learned and practiced NFP since that time, but since then God has opened my heart and enriched our lives with 4 more children that never would have existed if I'd been "fixed." Or rather, "broken," as my husband likes to correct.

We also started homeschooling around the same time we learned NFP (the same couple that taught us NFP also inspired us to homeschool). And although life kept getting crazier and crazier, somehow we made room in our hearts and our home for another (2001). And another (2003).

After six kids, homeschooling the older ones started to get more intense and time-consuming. I thought that our family should have been complete. Or more accurately, I just couldn't take any more and was ready to drive off a bridge. Hey, I never claimed to be a saint! And so the news of #7 didn't make my heart leap with delight. (picture mild catatonia instead) I moped around, cried a lot, thought "Why me, Lord? Can't you bless someone else for a change?"

But He wasn't finished with me yet. At 13 weeks, I felt that I might be leaking amniotic fluid, so the OB fit me in for an unscheduled ultrasound to measure my fluid. And it was then that she uttered those memorable words - "I think there might be more than one baby in there." I remember saying in a shaky voice "Well, do you think you could find out for sure??

She went to find the other OB in the practice to have her come in for a consult, to make sure it wasn't just ultrasound waves reflecting off bone. But she was gone an awfully long time. So I did what came naturally - grabbed the ultrasound wand and started moving it around my belly, trying to see what she saw. After many unsuccessful tries, I realized that I was looking in the wrong place. My tummy might have been poking out already, but my uterus was still way down in my pelvis, behind my pubic bone. So once I figured out where to look, I found them. Both of them. I felt like laughing, but it's hard to keep the ultrasound wand steady when your belly is bouncing up and down with laughter. I had pins and needles all over my body, and I just couldn't take my eyes off those amazing little blobs.

When the OBs returned (catching me red-handed) and confirmed the multiple pregnancy, I kept asking them for a blanket, asking if the air conditioning was turned up too high. One of them said "No, honey...you're in shock." Remember, iIt was the middle of June.

I had never even entertained the idea of twins before that day. This is because I never thought there was the remotest possibility I'd ever have them, and I'm too pragmatic to waste time and energy on the impossible. There are no twins anywhere on our family trees, and back then I thought that's the only way you got them. So I drove home (in a trance of disbelief) with a copy of the ultrasound as proof, and faxed it to my husband. He called me back in a few minutes, hooting and giggling. Giggling! I also phoned my best GF right away, since I was the first person she called 4 years earlier when she learned that she was having twins.

It is improbable and amazing, but finding out there was more than one baby completely turned my attitude around. Instead of despairing, I was elated and so excited. I don't know why this was so, but having twins completely changed everything.

Being in my late 30s, the OBs were naturally overcautious and pessimistic about my chances. They had me psyched up for bedrest and prematurity. But the pregnancy unfolded without complications. They were monozygotic (identical) twins with separate placentas, which to me was the best of combinations. I got to have identical twins (how cool is that?) without the danger of TTTS. They grew well, were each as big as a single baby would have been, and we made it to 38 weeks. I even went shopping on Black Friday, and was Christmas Eve mall shopping two days before the birth (although I moved like my arthritic grandmother). My blood pressure started to climb toward the end, so they scheduled a delivery before my BP could cause complications.

I didn't even think to take any pictures until the third trimester. Here I am at 31, 35 and 38 weeks. In retrospect I can see my face getting heavier and heavier. I guess I was retaining more fluid than I thought. I was also as hot as a blast furnace, day and night, couldn't breathe lying down, and had world-class indigestion for the last trimester. I spent many nights sleeping sitting up in a recliner.

The twins kept changing positions, but toward the end Natalie turned head up and stayed there. The OB told me that if I tried for a vag delivery I had a 50% chance of needing a c-section for the second twin if she didn't turn. The prospect of emergency surgery immediately following labor and delivery was not appealing. I decided to go with the odds and just have the surgery.

They were going to induce me on Dec. 29, 2006, but a few hours after midnight on Christmas, I had a coughing fit which broke my water. Did I mention I had bronchitis? For the previous two weeks I coughed my guts out every time I tried to lie down. I was really becoming a miserable sot, hugely pregnant with twins, hadn't had a night's rest in how long.

There weren't any contractions yet, so we putzed around the house and tried to rest until daylight. We live 22 miles from the hospital. The L&D nurses knew we'd be in around 7:00, and they reserved an operating room for 9:00. I think having my belly shaved was the weirdest part of the preparations. Once I was on the table, the bronchitis started bothering me something terrible. I hacked away like crazy whenever I tried to lie down. Finally the anesthesiologist gave me an albuterol inhaler. After a few puffs, no more coughing.

The babies were extracted at 9:15 and 9:17 a.m. on December 26, 2006. Our original due date was January 11, 2007, and I was really hoping to hang on to have the New Year's Babies. Our newspaper gives lots of prizes for the Baby New Year. And I could have had double prizes!!! But noooOOOooo.... Noelle was closer to the exit, so she became The First Noelle. She weighed 6 lbs 12 oz. Natalie was 6 lbs 13 oz.

It was my first section, and I thought it was a piece of cake. I've had natural births, epidurals, painful births after ineffective epidurals, inductions, nubain, morphine...I've even choked down a small bottle of castor oil, straight, to try to get an overdue baby to start moving out. (Hint - it worked, but don't do it unless you're a fan of explosive diarrhea. Or at least mix it with juice.) Honestly, the c-section was one of the best birth experiences I've had. The first day was awful, coming off of the morphine, but I healed very well and I can't say it was that much worse than the others.

We stayed in the hospital 4 days (I faked constipation to score an extra day) and I let the nurses take the babies as much as possible so I could rest. I never did that with the other kids - heck, once I checked myself out 12 hours after delivering so I wouldn't have to be away from my 2yo a minute longer than necessary (you fool) - but I knew once I came home there wouldn't be a moment's peace.

The whole first year is a blur. I can't pinpoint a single memory. Thank God I have pictures. I wasn't very good at tandem breastfeeding and I felt too exposed while doing it, so I nursed them one at a time. Then Natalie decided at 4 months that she didn't like nursing and shunned me completely, taking bottles for the next 6 months. At 10 months, she changed her mind again, and they both continued nursing sporadically until their 2nd birthday.


I do remember feeling overly protective and a little sorry for Natalie. She had jaundice worse than Noelle, so in the early pictures it's easy to tell them apart. Natalie's the orange one. She also was a better sleeper, soothed herself from early on by sucking her fingers, and once she started taking bottles, demanded very little special attention from me. I felt like she was being neglected, because Noelle was (and still is) so terribly fussy and demanding, crying all the time. It was mixed blessing that Natalie quit nursing, because Noelle thought both "nursers" belonged to her anyway. We used to call Natalie the Good Baby and Noelle the Butt Baby, because she was such a pain in the butt. Noelle really got the majority of our attention in those days. So my heart still has a soft spot for my little Natalie, who kept herself happy and asked so little of us.

Not The End.

3 comments:

Dianna@KennedyAdventures said...

AWW! I LOVE your story!! I didn't find the babies myself, but many days when I went to work, we'd go back in one of the rooms with the ultrasound machine, and look at them. Made me feel SO much better in the early days! I felt bad for our baby Thomas -- he was a breech extraction, and bruised, more jaundiced, got formula in the nursery, etc. It's easy to worry more about one than the other sometimes!!

Michele said...

Yep, I remember stopping in to the OB office many times during those first months...I just wanted another quick peek to make sure they were still okay, and that there REALLY WERE TWO OF THEM! I just couldn't believe it was really happening.

Kim said...

I really enjoyed this! I can relate to so much of what you've written--the initial shock and awe, the first time C-section (although mine wasn't as pleasant a recovery), and especially how the first year was a blur.